I could eat

a whole pie if it was in front of me. As long as it is in my face….I will eat it.

My problem is food. I have had some people laugh at me for they are facing much more painful and troubled times than saying no to a box of brownies. What makes my issue less of a problem than theirs? Maybe because I won’t die immediately? It’s not as serious to you because it doesn’t appear to be life altering. My addiction is a joke to most.

Looking at my medical records: I am 5’2″ and every three months I go to the doctor I am up 10 pounds. I am officially at 150 pounds. Will this stop? Probably not. I have a mental note in the back of my mind that I am getting more fat every time I step on the scale.

People compliment me on how great I look, so to me, I have time til I wont look as good anymore. In the back of my mind I am so uncomfortable. I am so sad. I love food and I can’t stop. The attempts I make at running or exercise are stopped by the next day having bad weather or some other lame excuse. Deep down I want to do something about it, but in the past 6 years I have tried nothing or I haven’t stuck to any plans long enough, so what can I do?

I know I love the taste of food. When I eat I feel a comfort no one else can give to me. I feel warm, fuzzy and at peace. Then I wake up and get dressed and I hate everything I see. But again, part of the problem is I am the only one who can see it. As I am typing this you are probably picturing some one very unhealthy. If you saw me in person I am really not that bad….yet. I am on my way. Help, because I can’t seem to help myself.

My comfort to eating is shopping…..if I can’t lose the weight then at least I can cover it up with great looking clothes.

Can I have a cookie? Or a dollar?

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